What the hell??

Okay so my bf is back from a family vacation to Vegas. 4 am I hear the tub being filled and the bathroom fan whooshing, since I know he's going to make a racket anyway I try to sleep but to no avail I am awake and cranky. Happy to have him home though. Anyway why do things always come in 3's? can someone inform me on the reasoning behind this? I have found a ride to and from work rather then the stinky smelly van. Bonuses being I get to sit in a car seat all to myself, I get to sleep in an extra hour in the morning AND I get home earlier! Sweet deal right? RIGHT! Anyway it turns out that the bfs car is not in tip top shape so I've been using mine all week which is great cause I never get to use my car however wouldn't you just know it I get to the carpool lot this morning and there is frigging plumes of steam emanating from the engine bonnet. SO.NOT.HAPPY. Why the f* does something crappy have to happen just when things were going great??? This wouldn't be so bad if I could just get the car towed when I get home and then get the bf to take me to pick it up tomorrow night. However I have to drive my car to work tomorrow cause my ride is leaving earlier so I need to pick up the rest of the carpool since we switch off now. Wouldn't you know it my car is broken... my bfs car is broken... I'm stuck up the creek without a paddle. ARGH ARGH ARGH! Why me? Maybe the tow truck driver will let me borrom his? Think thats a possibility?

***update***

Called the bf to ask him to check on my car and see if I was seeing things this morning, however he is uber crankpot today and has pretty much told me its not his responsibility and too bad, so sad take care of it myself. Stupid boys! I.AM.FUSTRATED.ARGH.

So much news so little time to write a darn thing

We have found our dream home! Its fifteen minutes from where we live now, has 3 bedrooms, a living room, den and kitchen. Big dining room and of course a bathroom. French doors that open out onto our back deck and a fairly good sized yard. The most amazing part is the ocean is almost in our backyard. Its five minutes from not one but TWO beaches and in the cosiest little neighbourhood. I'm so excited. There is however a snag, this is our first house ever so we have no clue what the hell to do to go about getting this place properly and not get f*ed with. Its going to be a learning process but boy am I ever ready to take on the challenge! The is another little snag too though. We found it three days before the bf and his family headed to Las Vegas for a vacation so I am left to my own devices and to fend for myself. I'm making appointments left and right hoping that I can set up times for when the bf comes home that would work for him and me to meet with the necessary sources to get this ball rolling and get our own abode! I am so pysched! Crossing my fingers that nobody snatches it right from under our noses. Tanywhoo, I haven't been sleeping well, waking up all hours of the night and rolling over to cuddle with the bf only to discover hes not there. The shock lasts for about a second or two then I remember hes off in Vegas having a great time while I lie here in our darkened room, listening to the whir of the fan and praying for the sandman to come and take me away again. I need sleep badly. I'm going to be an insominac by the time the bf comes home if things keep going the way they are now. *sigh* Come home soon I miss you.

So not feeling the blogger anymore but trying anyway

Okay so I have been slacking more then I have been contributing to this little online journal of my life eh? Oh well ces't la vie, life has just gotten too hectic but at the same time nothing really worth writing about has happened to me. No major changes in the love department, the fights are still occuring, my feelings are still up in the air and the crying is still being maintained so thats nothing new. There was some progress in a future direction, we have started looking at houses and I was actually starting to get excited and think about our future together and really starting to look forward to it until the tormoil started again last night. It seems as soon as I'm happy and on the right track my train derails and all is lost. The bf has decided that I'm a big speed bump in his plans for his future, he has yet to get over the stage that its not all about him anymore, I'm starting to think he's never going to get over that stage and I am wasting my time thinking that maybe he will be. Anyway fights ensued, tears were shed (by me heaven forbid he have any emotion other then anger) and harsh words were rained upon eachother. I spent the night on the pull out couch just to get away from him and have time to myself. Took a day and headed home to my parents and realized that, while it did feel good to be with them again, I don't feel like I belong there. Its like I'm in limbo and have no where to go so I just keep running on the hamster wheel trying to get ahead or even fall behind but get stuck in the middle of nowhere fustrated, angry and depressed.